STop The Abuse

How can you judge another

If you cannot see their Soul

And how can you tell another

If you do not know the whole.





Their feelings and emotions

Are but only theirs,

And to prying eyes

They'd simply hide their tears.....





Their anguish and their sorrow

Are known to only them,

As is their feeling of remorse

Towards their fellow men.





Ever listening to their Soul

For wisdom to make their choice

And gaining a strength from

Their gentle inner voice.





So do not judge another

No matter how it seems....

For we simply do not know

How the other one dreams.

by

Lizzytish





Child abuse, and in fact all kinds of abuse,

is something we all find to be an horrendous sin against humanity,

and even more so because it's perpetrated on the defenceless,

who are unable to protect themselves

or do anything about alleviating the situation.



We are told its an ongoing cycle........

perpetrated by those who've also been abused themselves.

Could be........ possibly is for the most part........ but not always...... not always.

For every story about abuse..... there are dozens more who have broken the cycle

and do not abuse their children or spouses or others....... but rather have become the opposite.



Its a favourite saying of children when adult

"I'm not bringing up my children like I was brought up....... "

How many of you reading this have said that ?

How many of you have moved on to a more fulsome lifestyle in your adult life

after having been abused as a child?

Quite a few I would imagine.

You may still bear the scars,

but it is those very scars that have made you the person you are today.........

given you the strength and will power not to go down that road with your own family.



Well its all a matter of choices isn't it..........

it is said that there is good in every one of us.... every one.....

its just the actions/choices we make that are bad, and bring us down.



And yes it is easy to go with the general consensus

"oh....... well it was done to me.......... so tough......... they can cop it too......... and everybody does it"

called the herd mentality that...........

Sooner or later you shoot yourself in the foot..........

its called a 'wake up call'........

and you find yourself telling yourself

"hang on a minute......... this has got to change..........."



Now I'm hoping here that there are some of you reading this

who have got to this point and are looking for answers to help you get out of this quagmire.

If you are in this situation..... your self-esteem is probably zilch ..........

you know its not right..........

but you just can't seem to get off the merry-go-round.

You can't bear the thought of being accused yourself.........

lets face it you've possibly had so many accusations laid against you in the past.......

you've closed your ears and eyes......... shut yourself in........ and just gone on.

The world is against you..... period........



Now take a deep breath...........

count to ten........

and think..........

of those little children in your care.........

they are precious to you........ very precious...........

don't tell me you don't feel that way............

because deep down inside you, you do........

they are your flesh and blood........

can you begin to feel how precious they are?



What I would like to do is tell you the story of someone

who instead of going down the path of abuse

because it had been handed out to her when she was a child..........

chose a different path........

and has gone on to excel herself and help other children.



Its the story of Mama Tina as she is known where she works.

Her name is Christina Noble,

an Irish woman, now in Vietnam and further afield.

Christina came from a family of four children

with a drunken father who left them with little or nothing........

so much so that their mother had to pawn the bedlinen to find money to feed them.........

When it was necessary to repair shoes,

their mother couldn't......... pieces of cardboard were used instead.

They were in extreme poverty,

remembering that there wasn't any social services/security like there is now.





With the hardship that this family

and this mother had to endure, her health suffered and she died.

The children were then separated and put into care.

Care being institutionalised.

When it was time for Christina to leave she was given £5. as pocket money......

She was met by her father in Dublin who 'borrowed' the money,

and promptly disappeared into a bar - never to be seen again.



Well you can imagine how devastated Christina would have felt.......

and she spent the next few years living in the streets and getting on as best she could.

She married, but unfortunately he too was a drunk and abused her and her children.

She finally left - bringing up her small family by herself.

She was always happy to extend that helping hand to others and give of herself.

Years passed by.....

the Vietnam war ensued.......

and some of you might remember the horrendous pictures we were treated to

of small children running from the napalm bombing with sheer and utter fear in their eyes and faces.....

This caught Christina's attention.........

and went on to haunt her for many years,

until finally when her own family had grown up, she decided to act on it.



She went to Vietnam,

without any knowledge of the country,

without any or very little money,

and without any backing from any group/Government.......

and offered her services to the authorities in Ho Chi Minh.

She just said that she wanted to help the street kids........

being one herself she understood how they would feel.



Her offer was accepted in a very limited fashion......

afterall they, the authorities couldn't see what the fuss was about, they had become used to it all.

She had an interpreter assigned.



What she would do, if they heard of any particular kids loitering,

was to go and find them,

talk with them and offer them help.



But there was a condition.......

they had to make the first move.

If they felt they would like her help, they had to come to her in the morning.

Gradually she built up her little hospice,

where now it has a school for orphans,

and hospital/clinic for the sick,

and she also finds ways to help the families in the streets to be self supporting.



She works extremely hard........

infact probably pushes herself too much.........

you can see it in her face how tired she is, and how her own health is suffering.

But her eyes just shine and she is so loving and caring towards her extended family.

Her own daughter is there too.... helping and giving.



Now each of us have special circumstances to be able to do things..........

and many of us don't/won't aspire to such great heights as Christina did,

but that is not to say that what we all choose

to contribute to this world of ours is not good enough to be commended and feel worthy of.

And to me this story is so inspirational and touching... it can lead us on to better things.



Here is someone who could very easily have continued her adult life

the way her childhood was formed,

and people would have said..........

well what can you expect.......... she was treated that way..........



Really you know that is such

a COP OUT......... a CRUTCH .....an EXCUSE

to continue the cycle of abuse

and those who are looking to help the abused shouldn't use that excuse.

To my mind it only perpetuates the circumstances.



There is no reason in the world why this awful abuse should happen.........

no reason at all..........



One can change.

One should change.

One must change.

But only YOU can change.

No one else can do it for you....



LizzyTish